Duelling Fire Read online

  Sara opened her mouth to speak, and then closed it again. Once again Harriet had chosen exactly the right attack. Did she feel any better? Could she honestly say that knowing her father had been dying and not told her made her feel less bitter? In all honesty, she had to admit that it did not, and Harriet pressed her advantage.

  ‘You see,’ she said triumphantly. ‘You know that I’m right. You were beginning to get over it, and some day, who knows, I might have shown you that letter for myself.’

  Sara was silent, and Harriet leaned forward to touch her sleeve. ‘Have you been so unhappy with me, honestly?’ she asked, her tone gentle now, and with a feeling of frustration Sara did not draw away.

  ‘So,’ Harriet relaxed against her pillows again, content at having won that particular round, ‘let’s forget all about it. And Jude, too. I’ll speak to him myself later.’

  Sara lifted heavy eyes. ‘You should have told me,’ she persisted. ‘That Jude was your son, I mean. I thought—I thought—–’

  ‘I chose to keep that affair to myself,’ Harriet interrupted her evenly. ‘After all, we hardly knew one another. And,’ she paused, for effect, Sara suspected, ‘I’m not proud of that incident in my life.’

  ‘Then why did you force Jude to come here?’ exclaimed Sara. ‘Why didn’t you leave him alone? He was happy—–’

  ‘Oh, he’s been pouring out his heart to you, hasn’t he?’

  ‘It wasn’t Jude, it was Janet,’ retorted Sara recklessly. ‘She told me—everything.’

  Harriet snorted impatiently. ‘Oh, dear! I was afraid of that. She always was absurdly fond of the boy. She looked after me while I was expecting him, you know. Then, afterwards, she accompanied me back to England.’ She laughed, rather wryly. ‘She would have had me keep him, you know. Perhaps it would have been better if I had. Perhaps if James had seen him as a baby, as a small boy, growing up, he would have found him irresistible. He certainly seems besotted with him now.’

  Sara shook her head. ‘Why did you do it?’

  ‘Do what? Bring him back to live with me? Didn’t Janet tell you that as well?’ She shrugged. ‘I wanted to make James suffer. I wanted to make him squirm every time he looked at Jude. It was an appropriate choice of name, don’t you think? Jude—Judas! I insisted on that small consideration.’

  Sara sighed. ‘But why did Lord Hadley employ him? Surely he didn’t have to.’

  ‘Ah …’ Harriet touched her nose with her finger in a conspiratorial gesture. ‘That was quite a brainwave of mine. You see, I knew James was looking for an assistant, and I mentioned that I knew of a young man who might suit the position. When he saw Jude, he knew who he was, of course. The resemblance is unmistakable, at least it is to us. And—well, Jude got the job. I don’t think James could have refused, once he had seen him.’

  ‘And Jude knew—–’

  ‘Not then.’ Harriet looked a little discomfited by this question. ‘Later. I told him—later. He didn’t let me down.’

  Sara was appalled. ‘That—that was a foul trick to play!’

  ‘Why?’ Harriet held up her head. ‘He owed it to me. He owes me a lot.’

  Sara bent her head. It seemed as though the picture she had had of Harriet had crumbled, just as that earlier impression had crumbled when first she came to Knight’s Ferry. She didn’t feel she knew her any more. She wasn’t even sure she wanted to.

  Lifting her head again, she took a deep breath. ‘I—I’m thinking of going away for a while, Harriet,’ she said bravely. ‘To—to London. Laura—that’s that nursing friend of mine—she’s been ill, and I’m going to go and stay with her.’

  Harriet’s lips drew in, but she merely lifted her shoulders in a gesture of acceptance. ‘Very well,’ she said. ‘When will you be back?’

  ‘I don’t know.’ Sara hesitated. ‘I don’t know whether I will be coming back.’

  ‘What!’ Harriet was aroused now. ‘What do you mean? Of course you’re coming back. It’s the Hunt Ball in three weeks, and I know Rupert is planning—–’

  ‘I’m not interested in what Rupert’s planning to do,’ said Sara steadily. ‘Oh, I’ve begun to realise what you had in mind. At first I didn’t, but now I’m beginning to see. You—you want me to marry Rupert, don’t you? To make up for all the humiliation you suffered—–’

  ‘Is that so outrageous?’ demanded Harriet harshly, but Sara could only shake her head.

  ‘It—it wouldn’t work, Harriet. It couldn’t ever work. I—I don’t love Rupert—–’

  ‘Love!’ Harriet was scathing. ‘What is love? I loved his father, and look what that gained me!’

  ‘Nevertheless,’ Sara insisted, ‘I don’t want to marry Rupert. I’m not interested in his—his money and his title—–’

  ‘You’d rather live in a suburban semi, and look after a swarm of squealing brats, I suppose!’

  ‘If I loved their father, of course,’ Sara responded fiercely.

  ‘What a waste!’ Harriet’s lips twisted. ‘With your looks—–’

  ‘Is that when you conceived this idea, Harriet?’ Sara asked bitterly. ‘When you saw my picture? I wonder what you’d have done if I’d been fat and homely.’

  ‘Who knows?’ Harriet refused to be drawn, her features cold and distant, and Sara rose to her feet.

  ‘I’m going now, Harriet,’ she said, and when the other woman didn’t answer, she impulsively bent and kissed her cheek. ‘Thank you,’ she said. ‘I don’t know how I’m going to repay you. But I’ll send you some money, as soon as I have a job—–’

  ‘I don’t want your money.’ Harriet was scornful. Then: ‘Have you told Jude you’re leaving?’ She paused, and finally added: ‘I think you should.’

  ‘No.’ Sara shook her head again. ‘I don’t think he and I have anything more to say to one another. Give him—give him my—my best wishes. In case I don’t see him before I leave.’

  It was after midnight when Sara’s train pulled into Paddington Station. She had missed the earlier express, which would have got her into London soon after ten o’clock, and the later train was infinitely slower and more noisy. In consequence, it was nearly half past one when her taxi stopped outside Laura’s flat in Benchley Street, and she hoped rather apprehensively that her friend was at home.

  She had not returned to Knight’s Ferry.

  After leaving the hospital, she had wandered round for a while, uncertain what she should do. But the idea of returning to Knight’s Ferry and possibly seeing Jude did not bear thinking about, particularly now that he knew how she felt about him. She didn’t want his scorn or his amusement, and the thought that he might pity her had sent her hurrying to the phone.

  Janet had been disapproving of her plans, but Sara could not have left without reassuring her. ‘I—I don’t know when I’ll be back, Janet,’ she said, avoiding a straight answer, and the Scotswoman had had to accept that she would not change her mind.

  ‘You watch what you’re doing, miss,’ the taxi driver said now, as she paid him his fare. ‘Not safe to be about alone at this time of the night. You sure your friend’s expecting you?’

  ‘Oh, I’m sure.’ Sara was touched by his concern. ‘I’ll be all right. And—thank you.’

  She thought he waited while she descended the steps to Laura’s basement entrance, but she hoped he would not hang about and hear her hammering at the door. He might even begin to wonder whether she was entirely to be trusted, and the last thing she needed was a policeman checking her story.

  It was dark in the well of the steps and she knew a moment’s misgiving as she went down them. Tramps had been known to make their beds in sheltered basement entrances, and even a policeman would be preferable to one of them.

  In consequence, her heart nearly leapt out of her breast when something moved in the shadow, and cold biting fingers dug into her shoulder. ‘Relax, it’s me!’ Jude’s harsh tones stifled the scream that rose in her throat, and she turned toward him incredulously, blind to everything excep
t his voice.

  ‘Jude!’ she breathed, her fingers running disbelievingly over the soft leather of his jacket, and then: ‘Oh, Jude!’ as weakness flooded her whole system.

  ‘Where the hell have you been?’ he demanded unsteadily, both his hands sliding over the curve of her neck and shoulder. ‘I’ve been waiting here for hours! I was beginning to think something had happened to you.’

  ‘I—I missed the early train at Swindon, and the one I got stopped at every station,’ she explained huskily. ‘But—oh! what are you doing here? Did—did Harriet send you?’

  Jude drew in his breath and she could feel the stiffening muscles beneath her fingers. ‘No,’ he muttered roughly, ‘nobody sent me. Now, do you have a key, or do we stand here all night?’

  Sara swallowed convulsively. ‘Is—isn’t Laura at home?’

  ‘If you mean the girl who lives here, sure she’s at home,’ agreed Jude flatly. ‘But she didn’t know me from Adam, and she said she knew nothing about you coming to stay with her. I think she thought I was stringing her a line, to find out if she was alone in the place, and she certainly wouldn’t let me in to wait for you on that shaky pretext.’

  Sara felt her lips curving upward in spite of herself. ‘Poor Laura,’ she murmured, with a husky chuckle, and Jude’s fingers suddenly dug into her neck.

  ‘What about me?’ he exclaimed. ‘I’ve been waiting for you since nine o’clock. Believe me, you owe me for the bad time you’ve given me!’

  Sara quivered. ‘I don’t understand—–’

  ‘No. And I don’t intend to conduct explanations on the doorstep,’ Jude retorted shortly. ‘Ring the bell or knock at the door, or do whatever is necessary to gain attention. I’m frozen!’

  ‘Your car—–’

  ‘—is parked quarter of a mile away,’ he finished for her. He gestured upward toward the street. ‘There’s no place to park around here, and I couldn’t risk missing you and having your friend tell me you didn’t want to speak to me.’

  Sara caught her breath. ‘I wouldn’t have done that.’

  ‘Wouldn’t you?’ Jude’s voice had deepened. ‘I wouldn’t have blamed you if you had. I was pretty brutal to you this morning, wasn’t I? But you made me so bloody mad—–’

  ‘Ssh!’

  Sara lifted her fingers to his lips, but instead of allowing them to rest there, Jude turned her palm against his mouth, and she felt the moist probing of his tongue. ‘Dear God, Sara,’ he groaned, ‘I’ve been nearly out of my mind—–’ and that searching caress was transferred to her mouth.

  He was cold, she could feel it. With only the thin silk of his shirt between her and his hard body, the chilling dampness of his flesh was unmistakable, and she hastily drew back.

  ‘You’ll get pneumonia!’ she choked, when her mouth was free, and then turned quickly as a light illuminated the dark area. Laura had turned on the lamp in the entry, and her faltering voice came to them in the sudden stillness.

  ‘Sara? Sara, is that you?’

  ‘Yes!’ Sara pulled herself away from Jude’s embrace and put her mouth close to the still-closed door. ‘Laura, open the door. It’s chilly out here.’

  ‘Are—are you alone?’

  Laura’s voice was still uncertain, and Sara sighed. ‘No,’ she said, ‘Jude’s with me. You know, the man who called earlier. Can we come in?’

  Laura hesitated a moment longer, and then to her relief Sara heard the key turning and the bolt being drawn. The door opened to reveal her friend, pale and anxious in her woolly dressing gown, and Sara didn’t hesitate before giving the other girl a hug.

  ‘Hello, love,’ she said. ‘How are you? I’m so sorry to spring this upon you, but—well, it’s a long story.’

  Laura’s eyes had moved to Jude who had entered the flat behind Sara, and was now closing the door behind him. She gave him a rather uncertain smile, and then returned her attention to Sara.

  ‘What’s going on?’ she exclaimed, leading the way into the small living room. ‘I thought you said you couldn’t get away, Sara.’ She shook her head. ‘I’m afraid I didn’t believe your friend—when he said you were on your way here.’

  ‘That’s understandable.’ Jude had positioned himself just inside the door, his hands pushed deep into his jacket pockets. ‘I guess I must look quite a disreputable character. I’m afraid I didn’t stop to shave before I left.’

  Sara glanced at him quickly, but to her the dark shadow on his jawline only added to his attraction. The look they exchanged turned all her bones to water, and she could hardly concentrate on what Laura was saying as the other girl made her explanations.

  ‘I mean, I didn’t know who he was,’ she was saying, switching on the electric fire. ‘So far as I knew your aunt had no relatives. You never told me she had a son, Sara.’

  Sara sighed. ‘I—I didn’t know.’ She gave Jude an appealing look. ‘Harriet didn’t tell me.’

  ‘It’s a complicated affair,’ he inserted flatly. He glanced round. ‘By the way, you don’t have any Scotch, do you? Just to warm us up a little.’

  ‘Only sherry, I’m afraid.’ Laura gave an apologetic grimace. ‘Will that do?’

  ‘Thanks,’ Jude nodded, and while Laura went to get the sherry from the kitchen, Sara went close to him again.

  ‘Are you very cold?’ she asked, pulling one of his hands from his pocket and chafing it between both hers.

  ‘Nothing that you couldn’t cure,’ he retorted softly. ‘Look, I have to talk to you. Is there any chance of us being alone together?’

  Sara’s pulses raced. ‘There’s only one bedroom. I—I share it with Laura.’

  ‘Not tonight,’ he said firmly, his eyes dark and intense, and Sara trembled.

  ‘We—we can’t,’ she breathed. ‘Not—not here—–’

  ‘I know that,’ he said, impatiently, taking both her hands behind his back. ‘But I want to spend the night with you, even if we have to spend it in armchairs!’

  Sara’s hands slid over his hips. ‘Oh, Jude—–’

  ‘Don’t do that, for God’s sake,’ he groaned, reluctantly propelling her away from him, and as he did so, Laura reappeared.

  ‘Here we—oh! I’m sorry—–’

  ‘It’s all right, Laura. Come in.’ Sara turned to her at once, and the other girl handed her two glasses of sherry. ‘Hmm, this is lovely,’ she added, after giving one to Jude. ‘An improvement on the cooking variety you used to have when I was here.’

  Her words eased the awkwardness of the situation, and Laura glanced behind her. ‘Look, I’ll leave you two alone,’ she offered. ‘You obviously have a lot to—to talk about.’

  ‘Oh, Laura—–’

  ‘No, really, I mean it.’ Laura smiled. ‘Mr Ferrars can stay the night if he wants to. If he doesn’t mind using the sofa.’

  ‘Thanks, Laura.’

  Jude smiled, and for a moment Laura was mesmerised by his dark fascination. Then, pulling herself together, she squeezed Sara’s arm and hurried out of the room, before either of them noticed her foolishness.

  Alone at last, Jude put down his glass of sherry, and flung himself full length on the sofa. ‘God, I’ve had it,’ he muttered, running his fingers over his eyes, and Sara hastily disposed of her glass before kneeling down beside him.

  ‘Are you all right?’ she exclaimed, turning his face towards her, and he uttered a tired, but satisfied, sigh.

  ‘Now I am,’ he agreed huskily. ‘If you forgive me.’

  ‘Me? Forgive you?’ she echoed faintly. ‘I should ask you to forgive me. I shouldn’t have been so quick to jump to conclusions.’

  ‘Why not?’ Jude grimaced. ‘It was what Harriet intended. Or at least, she didn’t want you to look in my direction when she was pointing you in another.’

  ‘Rupert,’ said Sara softly.

  ‘Rupert,’ he agreed.

  ‘She was wasting her time.’

  ‘Was she?’ His head was resting on a cushion, his eyes dark and insistent turn
ed towards her.

  ‘You know she was,’ replied Sara huskily.

  ‘I know you always hated me for touching you.’

  ‘I felt so guilty, didn’t I?’ Sara protested, her fingers moving over his jawline. ‘When I thought you—–’

  ‘I know,’ Jude overrode her roughly. ‘God, there were times when I hated Harriet!’

  ‘You could have told me,’ Sara persisted, her hands finding the loose knot of his tie and pulling it free.

  ‘What, when I suspected you might be like Harriet?’ He closed his eyes for a moment. ‘You know, I believed her when she told me you found Rupert attractive.’ He opened his eyes again as Sara’s widened in indignation. ‘She said I shouldn’t get any ideas about you. You wouldn’t look at a poor estate agent when the estate owner was ripe for the bait.’

  Sara gasped. ‘She said that!’

  ‘Something of the sort.’ Jude shifted on to his side. ‘Did you mean what you said this morning?’

  Sara found she couldn’t voice her feelings. She was too choked up. Instead she said: ‘When did she say it? Why did she say it?’

  ‘Why do you think?’ Jude’s hand circled the nape of her neck and caressed the soft skin. ‘You know, she was right about one thing: you are beautiful.’

  ‘Jude!’ Sara shivered under his hands. ‘You—you only answered half my question.’

  ‘Mmm? Oh, yes. When?’ He sighed. ‘Several times, I guess. How about the night of the Hadleys’ dinner party?’

  Sara blinked. ‘I heard you arguing that night. But I thought it was because you didn’t want to go.’

  ‘I didn’t.’ His thumb probed her lips, running the pad across her teeth. ‘Why would I want to be a witness to your growing involvement with Rupert—–’

  ‘My assumed involvement.’

  ‘Okay.’ His mouth softened indulgently. ‘Your assumed involvement. As it happened, I had to stand by and watch that idiot Hedgecomb undressing you with his eyes.’

  ‘Was he doing that?’